Mental health is something that effects everyone in a number of ways. This is my experience with it.
So… I’m skipping the formalities,
It is going to be one of those posts where I rant and express and just have a little word vomit about mental health. It’s a topic that can never be discussed ‘too much’. When I began writing this post I focused in on depression as this is where my personal experience is. However, after writing and deleting a few times I decided it should be about mental health in its entirety; nothing blurred or skipped over. And rather than just telling you my personal experiences I wanted to go a little further and explore not just mine but other peoples version of events and gather together ways to support people struggling with mental health.
If you follow me on my social media you would have seen a post or two asking for anyone to come forward and share their experience with mental health and the challenges it throws at people. I really appreciate those who have contributed and as promised I am keeping the people who contacted me, anonymous. This post isn’t just for those who don’t know what it’s like to struggle with mental illnesses but also for those who have and are currently. I want to create a platform where people can share these struggles and know that you are not alone; even though it may feel like you are.
Below I have put together some quotes from those who have spoken to me and are willing to share what mental health is to them.
“[It] feels like something is blocking a part of my brain and stopping me from really being me! I suffer from depression, although it can improve its always there so I guess I would say mental health will never really go away”
This resonated with me personally so much; I remember when I had a really bad episode it’s kind of like everything just shuts down and goes into standby mode. Everything is just sort of numb. I thought it was important to include that last bit as well because it’s true with so many people. Think of the happiest, most joyous person you know; looking at them, you would think they’ve never dealt with poor mental health, they are just so happy! But are they? The reality is they probably have seen the dark side of mental health and just because you see what someone’s exterior looks like; that doesn’t mean it is a true reflection of them. It may just be the identity they want you to believe so you don’t see what they are truly feeling.
“Mental health is an iron ball you drag with you each and everyday. Some days you just don’t have the energy to drag it anymore”
I really don’t think I need to say anything in response to this; when I read these words and many like it, it really does just make you think. Everyone is carrying this iron ball with them day in and day out. So why do so many people choose to ignore it?
“Due to my mental health I struggle with things some people don’t even blink an eye at. Sometimes I just stay in my house for a few days at a time not wanting to leave”
Try and comprehend this, being so mentally exhausted or just too afraid to go anywhere, speak to anyone. This really is how so many people feel and it isn’t something that should be looked past. It is so easy to say to someone, ‘Oh just think positive’ or ‘You’re being pathetic, talking on the phone is easy’. But for the person experiencing it, it takes up so much of their brain power, energy and time that actually no; it isn’t easy to make a phone call and sometimes you just can’t think ‘positive’.
Now, before I carry on, I want to take you back to the title.
Why? What? Who?
I chose this title because I believe they are key in starting this much needed conversation. When I was going through a depressive episode myself, I was constantly asking myself, why am I feeling like this? Why? Why? Why? and I’ve come to find out that for some people, that question will be as clear as day. But for others, like myself, I had no idea and sometimes there may not even be a clear solid answer. It is a frustrating thing to deal with and it makes all the ‘side effects’ and things I was feeling seem unworthy and pathetic; as if I was selfish for feeling like I did. Looking back now I wish somebody said to me; it’s okay to feel like this, it is normal and you don’t have to always know why something is happening. This takes me onto the next question, What? What is mental health? Hopefully, with the help of some brave individuals this has been outlined a little above. However, I do want to add that everyone experiences mental health in a vast variety of ways, it is a very subjective thing and all based on an individuals perception. So, who? Who does this effect? This ones easy, the answer is:
Anyone.
No matter what job you have or haven’t got, no matter the quantity of your social group or your grades in school. Mental health is something that can affect anyone at anytime in their life.
You may now be asking, well its all good knowing this but what can I actually do? How do I take action? The answer is all in my little list below.
Support: the person who contributed this point said that constant support seems to help, along with reassurance. I agree with this and I would add that the simple acknowledgement for the person struggling goes a long way. Just knowing that someone else understands and is listening to you, rather than judging you does massive amounts.
Positive Distractions: I made sure to say positive distractions here, as I know for me, I used to sway towards very harmful methods of distraction. Whereas, the simple things like reading a book, listening to music and hanging out with people just make everyday a little easier as it allows you a few minutes away from your brain to focus on other things.
Reflection/Realistic thinking: sometimes going for a walk and reflecting on your thoughts can be helpful. Ask yourself, what really is the worst that can happen? Is this thing really as bad as it seems?
Exercise: One of the above people said this as they have seen this work first hand. They said from their own experiences after going running, they have seen a huge difference in their mental well being. This is a great one to consider, even a small amount of light exercise or even a walk as stated above; it can make a whole load of difference, mentally and physically. Now, I’m not telling you to go and run a marathon or train everyday for two hours; but just some sort of movement, round your house or round the block, it doesn’t matter but anything helps.
I hope from reading those small insights into other peoples mental health helps you grasp just how it can affect people and gain even a small understanding into it. And I hope that I have provided you with helpful tips to get through each day, whether it’s for you or your friend/family, they are ways you can help.
Have you got any tips? Do you want me to write more like this?
Let me know in the comments and if you need to talk don’t hesitate to contact me!
– El x